Thought of the Week

Speaking as a woman...men, listen up. I have some great advice for you.

The key to a woman's heart is this: courtship. Women want to be courted...they want romance.

Learn the art of courtship, and you are 90% of the way there.

Of course, knowing what is involved in actually courting a woman is a whole other matter....

Halloween Pics

My Costume...Meow!


The Trunk!

These are from "Trunk or Treat" at my church. Good times!

Separation of Church and Church

I was priviledged recently to engage a good friend of mine in a theological discussion about the role of doctrine in the lives of Christians and the Church as a whole. It was my view that the idea of doctrine leans toward religiosity, which I try to avoid at all costs because I think it tends to separate the body of Christ more than unify it. She clings quite closely to that same doctrine that I try to avoid, because she says that the church's doctrine (Catholic, Methodist, Church of Christ, Baptist, Presbyterian, Episcopal, etc.) defines the sermons it gives, the activities it engages in, etc.

During our discussion, I could feel her putting up a wall. Since then, I learned that she went away feeling that I did not respect her position, that I had preached at her, and that she felt I was ignorant in "my" church's doctrine and should learn about it. I am hurt by what she said because I tried very hard to remain relaxed and open during the entire conversation. Her exact words in her later email were,

"I was totally shocked at how uneducated you were about your denomination. I know you don't like denominations, but regardless, this is your chosen one at the moment. I think education is key to anything and you can't just say, well I read the Bible, that is all that matters."

I would like to argue that I can say that. Because, the theology of any particular denomination does not bind God. However, God gave us his word; he is perfect, and will honor what he has said. Therefore, when I read the bible, I know what the truth is. Likewise, I feel that even the idea of denominations is unbiblical.

When the church was forming in those first centuries, Paul warned the various churches to watch out for division. To the church in Rome, he said, "I urge you, brothers, to watch out for those who cause divisions and put obstacles in your way that are contrary to the teachings you have learned." (Romans 16:17). To the church in Corinth, he wrote, "I appeal to you brothers, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that all of you agree with one another so that there may be no divisions among you and that you may be perfectly united in mind and thought." (1 Corinthians 1:10). Christ warned us of this very problem: "Every kingdom divided against itself will be ruined, and every city or household divided against itself will not stand." (Matthew 12:25).

There are many, many other examples in the old and new testaments about how division causes failure, but unification will glorify. Therefore, I do not spend my time dwelling on those aspects that will divide the church. We should turn to the bible when we wonder what to do. My friend pointed out that at some churches, and she specified the Baptist church, you have to be a member of that church, according to its doctrine, to partake of the Lord's supper. Who is allowed at the Lord's supper? Everyone. When the members of the church in Corinth didn't wait for people, when the were divided about who was allowed to partake of the Lord's supper, Paul chastised them. (1 Corinthians 11:17-34). Jesus said, "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: Love your neighbor as yourself. All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments." (Matthew 22:37-40). We are not called to exclude people, but to welcome people. "For God so loved the world that he gave his one ande only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life" (John 3:16, emphasis added).

I'm not sure if my friend will ever see what I'm trying to say about not focusing on those things that divide us, but bring us together; that the bible is the only set of "rules" that counts. I think the unease between us right now is rather symbolic of the unease within the church as a whole. Personally, I still don't think knowing or not knowing about the particularized doctrine of the church I go to will serve me as a Christian. I will attend a church that follows bibical teachings and no others; I will not attend a church that treats the bible as a euphemism or excludes people. As far as point of view, I will use the discernment given to me through the Holy Spirit to listen to what my pastor says. We are called to do that in all areas of our lives, and that includes in church. You have to watch out for false teachings. Regardless, my prayer is that enough people will see my point regarding denominations that the church can become a unified force in the world to effect change and enable the Holy Spirit to move in the hearts of men.

20/20 Foresight

It has become a habit of mine recently to complain. Everyone has negative things in their lives, but recently for some reason, I've thought that my burdens were somehow greater or more important than others...that it was time for me to have some "self" time.

Listening to Third Day's "Cry Out to Jesus" made me change my thinking.

Several years ago, I began loosing weight. Back in 2001, I weighed significantly more. Four years later, I'm 110 pounds lighter. I've manage to keep all the weight I've ever lost off; that is truly a blessing. When I was heavier, I use to wonder why God had allowed me to become that way at such an early age. I remember back into elementary school being overweight. At that point, it was more my parent's duty than my own to make eating choices for myself. Over the years, their bad habits became my own. It took going to college and living on my own to change. I wondered many times over those years why God hadn't provided me with a different situation.

However, God walked with me through my weightloss; I did indeed cry to Jesus many times. Since that journey, people are always shocked to find out I weighed so much more at one point. What was a burden at one point, what drove me to incredible self-hatred before, grace has turned into a blessing. I've been able to be a real, personal role-model for dedicatedly changing something about myself. One of my friends is loosing weight right now and says that she knows she can because I did. God has given me the opportunity to witness in a way I never thought possible: by using my own struggles to glorify him - I never would have made that journey but for God's grace.

Today, when I struggle, I complain. It seems I've forgotten that God uses our struggles to teach us and others. What I learn today, I can share tomorrow. If Christ was as self-centered as I've been recently, if he had as much self-pitty as I do, man would the world be in trouble. The saying goes that hindsight is 20/20. I say that for Christians, so is foresight. No matter the problems I have today, I know that God will use the lessons I learn in my life and the lives of others. I know that I am here for a reason and I won't be here longer than he needs me to be.

Another Golden One

Again, my First Amendment prof makes my day:

The KKK are equal opportunity haters...they hate everyone.

This was noted after reading Virginia v. Black, in which, inter alia, it was O.K. for the "klan" to get together and burn a cross during a rally about how they hate certain people...i.e., people who weren't a part of their group. LoL, I wonder what songs they were chanting.

The Language of Love

One of the most common problems between men and women is that they don't understand each other. That isn't because either sex is incapable. I think it is because people think and act in their own terms; their ways of showing affection are self-oriented. To facilitate communication, I think men and women should learn to speak a language of love.

Speaking the language of love, there is no better example than how Jesus expressed his love for us. To show us he loved us, he gave his life, himself. Because we were unable to act Godly and not sin, he took the punishment: death. He conquered death for us. In return, he asks us to do the same thing; we are to die to this world and be "born again" (like Christ was when he was "risen") and live a new life, modeled after his own. In love, we should give ourselves back to him.

Men and women should learn from this example. When communicating, when showing affection and love, they should start thinking about how they can give themselves to the one they love. Say, for example, I write poems for the person I love, be it a family member, a boyfriend, or a friend. That is most likely because that is how I want love to be shown. "Do unto others as you would have then to unto you." Therefore, if anyone wants to show me love in return, they should try writing me a poem, a letter, or something small like that. Speak my language. And, I should do the same in return. I should give whatever it is the other person needs.

It is said love is not selfish; that is true. But at the same time, it is thoughtful. For many reasons, sometimes people seem to need more than at other times. Loving them, we should unselfishly give ourselves by taking time and understanding what it is they need.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The following is republished in the comments, but since it goes to the substance of the post, I thought I would paste it here:

The most important thing is, my entry isn't based on expectations of the first person, but the perceptions of the other person. We should be discerning enough to perceive what the other person needs. In fact, if we expect anything in relationships, that is often disappointing and destructive. What I'm trying to say is, in relationships, when showing love and affection, we shouldn't show it in ways we desire, but in ways the other person desires. When I show my family I love them, I do it in their terms (my mom loves to talk, so I listen!).

i carry your heart with me

By: e. e. cummings

i carry your heart with me (i carry it in
my heart) i am never without it (anywhere
i go you go, my dear; and whatever is done
by only me is your doing, my darling)

i fear
no fate (for you are my fate, my sweet) i want
no world (for beautiful you are my world, my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows
higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart (i carry it in my heart)

Defensive Driving

According to a new poll, Americans are getting ruder. "From road rage in the morning commute to high decibel cell-phone conversations that ruin dinner out, men and women behaving badly has become the hallmark of a hurry-up world." "The most common complaint about rudeness in the poll was aggressive or reckless driving, with 91 percent citing it as the most frequent discourtesy."

Anyone who knows me knows that I am an aggressive driver. Therefore, I must take up the cross as it were, and perform my duties as an aggressive driver apologist.

It must be noted that, with exceptions, most drivers become "aggressive" and "rude" when another driver...a sloooowwwww driver...cuts in front of him or her. Take the following senario as an example. You are late. Very late. If you are good enough, you can just make it to (fill in the blank with an important place) on time. You are in the middle lane; people are filling up the right and left lanes to turn right up at the light ahead. The person in front of you gets over into the right lane, and the road in clear until past the light...you will make it! Then, just as you hit 30 mph, a mini-van "merges" in front of you (I would prefer "cuts", but I'll be nice). The driver proceeds to go slowly, causing you to miss the light. UGH!

There are many such examples. Sllloooowwww drivers going 10 mph below the speedlimit, coming to complete stops before turning, not using their indicators, stopping at yellow lights, sitting at stop signs waiting for everyone and his brother to go first (out of the order learned long ago in driver's ed). Though I would make the argument that they create us, slow drivers at the very least perpetuate the aggression and rudeness in those of us who actually like to get where we are going.

So I say to those of you who drive in two lanes, who drive slowly in the left lane versus the right lane like you should, who seem uncaring that the person behind is late and needs you to move over, YOU should stop being so selfish. Stop being selfish enough to think the road is yours alone; move over, to that right lane where you belong, obey more of the traffic laws, and I bet you will notice a marked decrease in the aggression of other drivers.

Quote of the Day

From my First Amendment Professor

The Supreme Court is here is save the day, to keep the world safe from or for democracy, I'll let you decide which.

Bring It!

I Love Cold Weather!

Please Make It Stay!

My Favorite Branch

Law.com had a story about the new Chief Justice. Here are some of my favorite quotes. They show both the history and oddities of my favorite branch of government.

The first day of the Court's fall term began early, with senior Justice John Paul Stevens administering a ceremonial oath to Roberts, who had been sworn in more formally last Thursday. President George W. Bush looked on from the seat in the Court reserved for -- but rarely used by -- the president.

Stevens also noted that in his previous career in the Solicitor General's Office and in private practice, Roberts had argued 39 cases before the Court, "a number that exceeds the combined experience of the rest of us. We know him well, and he has already earned our respect and admiration."

The Miers announcement overshadowed the pageantry of the Court ceremony somewhat and was the buzz among the luminaries on hand. "A stealth candidate, par excellence" was the verdict on Miers from Harvard Law School professor Laurence Tribe, who had been invited to attend by Roberts, a former student in his constitutional law class. But the formalities were in keeping with Court traditions. Before he was sworn in, Roberts sat waiting in a chair below the Court's bench. As expected, the sleeves of his black robe carried no golden stripes; Roberts has apparently allowed Rehnquist's Gilbert & Sullivan-inspired wardrobe innovation to lapse.

Roberts asked five questions in the first case and seven in the second, placing him in the "moderately active" category in comparison with his colleagues -- about the same number that Stevens asks, fewer than Antonin Scalia usually asks, but far more than Clarence Thomas. In a single day, Roberts asked lawyers more questions than Thomas has asked in several terms combined.

And that was just day one! Love it!

Flight Plight

From Reuters...

Labor unions representing most of the nation's 90,000 flight attendants have urged their members to boycott a new Jodie Foster film that portrays a flight attendant and a U.S. air marshal as terrorists.

A union statement issued on Tuesday also complained that other flight attendants in the film are shown as being "rude, unhelpful and uncaring."

She said the portrayal of airline cabin crew members as evil-doers adds further insult to long-standing Hollywood stereotypes that have depicted flight attendants as sexualized bubble heads or as harsh, humorless disciplinarians.

Aw, poor flight attendants. I must wonder if they ever noticed how many movies portray lawyers as evil people...or women who pursue careers as heartless individuals, willing to use sex appeal to get to the top...or men as womenizers in any context...or Muslims as terrorists...or people from Kentucky as white trash.

I guess I must sound rude, but I'm feeling a bit unsympathetic to their cause.

An Odd Parallel

In a law.com news article, one of my favorite justices, Justice Scalia was quoted as saying the following:

"The line between protected pornography and unprotected obscenity lies between appealing to a good healthy interest in sex and appealing to a depraved interest, whatever that means."

I'm forced to wonder, is an interest in pornography a good healthy interest in sex? I would argue that it is not. I'm not sure what constitutes a "healthy" interest in sex, and when that healthy interest is good or bad...I'm not even sure what a bad healthy interest would look like.

The clear confusion on this topic goes to a larger point: the Supreme Court, for all its good intentions, needs to engage in a massive reexamination of the first amendment doctrine. In that same article, Scalia admitted that the Court has not done a good job of defining obscenity. I think the court hasn't done a good job in defining a lot of first amendment issues...making the dialogue surrounding the subject matter unfocused.

For example, the so-called "establishment clause" has been construed to mean "separation of church and state." However, when you read the constitution and its amendments, nothing about separation is ever mentioned. When making an attempt to read the most literal of meanings, really, it would appear the whole point is that Congress can't make a national religion, much like France and England had at the time our nation was formed. Our society has gone too far, trying to require that government employees appear divorced from their values at work.

That is the theory. In practice, I have two wonderful examples of how the secularists fail. Here in Lubbock, County Court Judge, Judge Head, has many books in his office about faith. These include several copies of daily devotionals. He even has a pillow with a quote from the Book of Isaiah about following where God leads you. Also, while working at the DA's office, being a very talkative person, I've made friends with one of the secretaries, Linda. She is a Christian, and we have had many open discussions, especially in the wake of all these hurricanes, about the power of God in our daily lives. She loves the song, "In Christ Alone" (quoted in one of my May entries), and I'm taking her a CD full of Christian music on Monday. Government employees or not, these people carry their values with them as they work.

Coming back to my original point, it would appear the Supreme Court has a lot to learn about the first amendment. Perhaps our Justices should "slum" a little, and work in a grass roots area to see how it works in the "real" world, outside the marbled walls of the court. Then, perhaps, we wouldn't have "healthy sex interests" and "pornography" tied together.

Fear No Evil

...The fact is…bad things do happen and we do live in a world filled with deep, dark valleys. And in this age of anxiety, we hear more and more of panic attacks and episodes of fear that absolutely demoralize and defeat people. But as believers, you and I must realize that Satan only uses fear to keep us discouraged and in despair.

God loves you so much that He allows tragedy and trouble to enter your life to draw you closer to Him. First Peter 5:10 says, “But may the God of all grace, who called us to His eternal glory by Christ Jesus, after you have suffered a while, perfect, establish, strengthen, and settle you.”

If you suffer from fear of what’s next in your life, then you can rest assured that there is freedom from it. Consider the fact that you and I have a Shepherd that will lead us through the deepest, darkest, fear-filled valleys. Ask God to carry you through times of fear and calm your spirit with His peace.

--Pastor Graham

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil; for You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.
--Psalm 23:4

To my Dad, Richard, Cody, Sarah, her son Kaden, and Fred and Judy Allen (my mom has a very full house, bless her heart!).

In the Interlude

In his daily email, my pastor wrote the following:

"Most people don’t like to wait—we are very impatient. When I drive up to an intersection and see a green light turn yellow, what do I do? I punch the gas pedal and try to make it through the light because I don’t like to wait. But don’t laugh at me, because I know that’s what most of you do too....We tend to think that the yellow light means “hurry up and get through the intersection” when in fact it means “slow down, there could be danger ahead.” The problem is…we’re always in a hurry when God isn’t....God doesn't speak to you in a booming voice while you're speedily hurrying through life. You can hear the still, small voice of the holy spirit when you take some time to stop, rest, and actually listen."

Waiting comes down to issues of value - we are more willing to wait for things on which we place value. So when we punch the pedal through the light, we are placing value on ourselves and our own plans rather than humbling ourselves enough to let other people go first.

In the greater scheme, we should place value on God's plan for our lives by lifting the lead foot and getting down on our knees. The hard thing about trusting God is that He isn't bound by time, and the moments between submission to His will and knowing where He is taking you can seem very long. The key is to enjoy that interlude...since that is as much a part of His plan as anything else.

This post is dedicated to one of my very good friends, for whom I know waiting is the hardest part in her life right now.

Thought of the Day

Don’t get caught up in the paralysis of analysis, but move forward and God will direct your steps. Take some risks. Don’t wonder what might have been...

- Dr. Jack Graham, Pastor of Prestonwood Baptist Church, Plano, TX.

Funny Funny Man

People often ask why I refuse to see Sean Penn movies. I respond: "It is because I can't stand him."

In the spirit of things, I wanted to display this picture for all to see along with some quotes from a Herald Sun article, "Sean Penn's rescue bid sinks":

EFFORTS by Hollywood actor Sean Penn to aid New Orleans victims stranded by Hurricane Katrina [floundered] badly overnight, when the boat he was piloting to launch a rescue attempt sprang a leak....The actor, known for his political activism, was seen wearing what appeared to be a white flak jacket and frantically bailing water out of the sinking vessel with a red plastic cup....With the boat loaded with members of Penn's entourage, including a personal photographer, one bystander taunted the actor: "How are you going to get any people in that thing?" (end article excerpt).

Good try Mr. Penn. Noble effort aside, why the personal photographer? The fewer people you bring, the more you can take with you, right?

Katrina's Fogotten

Mississippians' Suffering Overshadowed

By EMILY WAGSTER PETTUS
Associated Press Writer

.... Richard Gibbs was disgusted by reports of looting in New Orleans and upset at the lack of attention hurricane victims in his state were getting.

"I say burn the bridges and let 'em all rot there," he said. "We're suffering over here too, but we're not killing each other. We've got to help each other. We need gas and food and water and medical supplies." ....

... In a strongly worded editorial, The Sun Herald of Biloxi-Gulfport pleaded for help and questioned why a massive National Guard presence wasn't already visible.

"We understand that New Orleans also was devastated by Hurricane Katrina, but surely this nation has the resources to rescue both that metropolitan (area) and ours," the newspaper editorialized, saying survival basics like ice, gasoline and medicine have been too slow to arrive.

"We are not calling on the nation and the state to make life more comfortable in South Mississippi, we are calling on the nation and the state to make life here possible," the paper wrote. ...

Failed Civil Order

"Give me your tired, your poor,
Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,
The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.
Send these, the homeless, tempest-tost to me,
I lift my lamp beside the golden door!"

Unless those tired and poor are already here,
In which case I will smother them...
Those wretched refuse on my own battered shores
Those homeless and tempest-tossed,
I crush them, dead and dying, by my own indifference!

State of Nature

...The chaos deepened despite the promise of 1,400 National Guardsmen a day to stop the looting, plans for a $10 billion recovery bill in Congress and a government relief effort President Bush called the biggest in U.S. history.

New Orleans' top emergency management official called that effort a "national disgrace" and questioned when reinforcements would actually reach the increasingly lawless city.

About 15,000 to 20,000 people who had taken shelter at New Orleans convention center grew ever more hostile after waiting for buses for days amid the filth and the dead. Police Chief Eddie Compass said there was such a crush around a squad of 88 officers that they retreated when they went in to check out reports of assaults.

"We have individuals who are getting raped, we have individuals who are getting beaten," Compass said. "Tourists are walking in that direction and they are getting preyed upon."

Col. Henry Whitehorn, chief of the Louisiana State Police, said he heard of numerous instances of New Orleans police officers - many of whom from flooded areas - turning in their badges.

"They indicated that they had lost everything and didn't feel that it was worth them going back to take fire from looters and losing their lives," Whitehorn said....

...An old man in a chaise lounge lay dead in a grassy median as hungry babies wailed around him. Around the corner, an elderly woman lay dead in her wheelchair, covered up by a blanket, and another body lay beside her wrapped in a sheet.

"I don't treat my dog like that," 47-year-old Daniel Edwards said as he pointed at the woman in the wheelchair.

"You can do everything for other countries, but you can't do nothing for your own people," he added. "You can go overseas with the military, but you can't get them down here."

The street outside the center, above the floodwaters, smelled of urine and feces, and was choked with dirty diapers, old bottles and garbage.

"They've been teasing us with buses for four days," Edwards said. "They're telling us they're going to come get us one day, and then they don't show up."...

..."We've got people dying out here - two babies have died, a woman died, a man died," said Helen Cheek. "We haven't had no food, we haven't had no water, we haven't had nothing. They just brought us here and dropped us."

Tourist Debbie Durso of Washington, Mich., said she asked a police officer for assistance and his response was, "'Go to hell - it's every man for himself.'"...

From: New Orleans in Anarchy With Fights, Rapes, by ALLEN G. BREED