Tuesday, November 01, 2005

20/20 Foresight

It has become a habit of mine recently to complain. Everyone has negative things in their lives, but recently for some reason, I've thought that my burdens were somehow greater or more important than others...that it was time for me to have some "self" time.

Listening to Third Day's "Cry Out to Jesus" made me change my thinking.

Several years ago, I began loosing weight. Back in 2001, I weighed significantly more. Four years later, I'm 110 pounds lighter. I've manage to keep all the weight I've ever lost off; that is truly a blessing. When I was heavier, I use to wonder why God had allowed me to become that way at such an early age. I remember back into elementary school being overweight. At that point, it was more my parent's duty than my own to make eating choices for myself. Over the years, their bad habits became my own. It took going to college and living on my own to change. I wondered many times over those years why God hadn't provided me with a different situation.

However, God walked with me through my weightloss; I did indeed cry to Jesus many times. Since that journey, people are always shocked to find out I weighed so much more at one point. What was a burden at one point, what drove me to incredible self-hatred before, grace has turned into a blessing. I've been able to be a real, personal role-model for dedicatedly changing something about myself. One of my friends is loosing weight right now and says that she knows she can because I did. God has given me the opportunity to witness in a way I never thought possible: by using my own struggles to glorify him - I never would have made that journey but for God's grace.

Today, when I struggle, I complain. It seems I've forgotten that God uses our struggles to teach us and others. What I learn today, I can share tomorrow. If Christ was as self-centered as I've been recently, if he had as much self-pitty as I do, man would the world be in trouble. The saying goes that hindsight is 20/20. I say that for Christians, so is foresight. No matter the problems I have today, I know that God will use the lessons I learn in my life and the lives of others. I know that I am here for a reason and I won't be here longer than he needs me to be.

1 comment:

Johan Jordaan said...

During my university years I became severely depressed. I slept 18 hours a day and I found it hard to perform even the simplest of tasks. After 2 years of this, I decided to make an end to it all. My mother didn’t know what was wrong but she knew better than to leave me alone. We sat around a kitchen table that night. She was praying for me, and I was crying even though I was numb inside. The next day I decided to just keep going. That was the turning point in my illness. Now I’m able to understand what drives people to such drastic steps, and I have been able to witness to quite a few people, and encourage them, to keep going. I’ve been medication and symptoms free for more than 4 years.